Saturday, February 9, 2008

Jack Sprat

Jack Sprat could eat no fat

His wife could eat no lean

And so betwixt the two of them

They licked the platter clean

Now, doesn't that old nursery rhyme just about sum up how I am feeling this morning? Yesterday my doctor told me that I need to lose weight and get back into exercising. My asthma and asthma-related illnesses have conspired to render me fairly innactive the past few years and my weight (and blood pressure) have risen as a result.

My allergist has told me that I need to weigh myself not once, but twice, every day (speaking of which...). Okay, I'm back now, and no. I'm not telling you what I weigh. Let's just say that you wouldn't want me to sit on you.

I am also supposed to skip the carbs in my diet. He warned me to not completely eliminate carbs as my body would start craving them and much carnage would ensue once I gave in to the desire to eat carbs. Now, here's the funny part: my husband is susceptible to gout, so he cannot eat a low-carb diet lest he suffer a recurrence. Cooking for the two of us ought to be fun!

Grumbling the entire time, I did get on my neglected exercise glider yesterday for the required 10 minutes (I am to work up to 30 to 40 minutes a day, 5 to 6 times a week), and for my trouble, felt an asthma attack coming on. This is supposed to help me? Well, maybe. If it doesn't kill me first.

I should tell you that my doctor has a wacky sense of humor. He was suggesting alternatives to carbs in my diet and said that chicken is a wonderful source of lean protein. "Oh, but you can't eat chicken because you are allergic," he dryly comments. Thanks, doc. Personally, I think he's out to get me.

I do know that I have already lost seven pounds in the past couple of weeks. I know this because my daughter dragged me on to the scale. Have I mentioned that both she and the doctor are violating my civil rights? Because I have always declared that it is against my religion to weigh myself. Oh well, I will keep you posted. Provided I survive to tell the tale, that is.

And just because I am a visual person and need a bit of cheering up, here is a nice garden vignette curtesy of Munchkin Gardens, Depauw, Indiana.

1 comment:

Rosie Hawthorne said...

What kind of doctor recommends weighing yourself twice a day? That's freaking crazy. That's sounds suspiciously like anorexic-type behavior.